Reflections Part 2

So it seems it’s been a little while since my last post. Not because I have had nothing to blog about of course but mainly because things have been a little crazy and the weeks just seem to fly by at the moment!

In my last post I spoke about body image and what we see when we look in the mirror. This was a post very close to my heart as I myself was struggling with the changes to my body post competing earlier this year and as I took a look around and listened to clients I realised that sadly most women look in the mirror and are not happy with their reflection. Or that most women place a massive amount of pressure on themselves to weigh a certain number and even further place their happiness on that. E.g. “I’d just be happy if I lost 10kg” or “I’d be so happy if I weighed only 50kg”.

So today I want to talk a little bit more about my own journey to resuming a happy and healthy relationship with my body and myself and I also want to encourage everyone out there to a. stop being your own worst enemy by talking about yourself or your body negatively b. stop placing your happiness on a number or anything similar (e.g. I’ll just be happy if I have a 6 pack or lean arms or smaller legs) and c. stop comparing yourself to others as they are not you!

Let me first start by telling you all that my own journey to body happiness is still a “work in progress” where I take each day as it comes. There are days that I look in the mirror and focus on the things I love about my body and feel completely at ease and happy with my appearance and then of course there are days where all that I can see are what I consider as my flaws and get that little craving in my head thinking “I just want to be lean again.” I made the decision not to compete this season as deep down I knew I had the wrong intentions of it the second time round and it was more important to restore health and happiness from the inside before I decided to step on stage again.

Now don’t get me wrong I know most people would look at me and ask “What does she mean, she is lean?” but remember as I spoke about in my previous post, what we see and what others see can be two completely different images. Everyone has their own idea of how they look and this is why I think that people need to learn to look past that mirror reflection because otherwise they may never find what they seek there.

So what do I do on these days when the negative voices try and deter me and get me feeling down about myself?

1.       I make sure I do put effort into my physical appearance. Doing my hair, makeup and wearing something that I feel comfortable and confident in. Sounds like something so small and maybe silly but the fact is when you look good you do feel good to some level. 

2.       In saying this like I said physical appearance isn't the be and end all so I also make sure I eat well and I train because while I may not feel great about my body that day I need to remember the BIG picture and need to continue to look after myself on the inside as well instead of self sabotaging by eating something off plan or skipping the gym. At the end of the day eating a block of chocolate is really only going to make me feel worse not better.

3.       Whenever I catch myself in the mirror I try and smile. Yep I smile. I remind myself of all of the good things in my life. I count myself lucky to have my health and fitness and be able to share my knowledge and skills with others. Again something so small and yes I’m going to sound cheesy (no pun intended) but a smile truly is one of the best things a person can wear. Someone who has a smile on their face radiates inner happiness and beauty more than someone with a scowl or frown. Remembering too that I work in a gym so I’m surrounded by mirrors A LOT each day lol.

Now I know you may read these things sceptically but these are just things that I do, things I find help me in the moments of self doubt and criticism.  

For those of you out there who are resting your happiness on being 5kgs lighter, on getting rid of those flabby arms, on having a flat stomach, ask yourself this “Will I truly be happy if I get these things?” and “Am I willing to do whatever it takes to get there?”

If getting (and keeping) a flat stomach means cutting out all of your favourite sweet and or savoury treats, never being able to dine out or enjoy a glass of wine with friends, having to train 6 days a week, then are you willing to do that? You are? Ok great. Then tell me how “happy” you are when you get that flat stomach, yet have socially isolated yourself from all your friends and family. You may be happy externally at what you see when you look in the mirror, but will you be happy or healthy internally?

Internal health/happiness is something that is highly overlooked these days and it’s really sad that in an industry all about health and fitness the focus has drifted primarily to the aesthetics of a person which realistically is only a portion of assessing how one takes care of their body.

As I spoke about in my previous blog on this subject the focus on how our bodies look seems to outweigh what our bodies can actually do. Looking after your body is important but if you are doing it solely for aesthetic purposes then I can safely say you will probably never be truly satisfied. Sure you may get that flat stomach through constant dieting but then you will decide you want bigger shoulders/glutes/back and realise to gain muscle you need fuel. You need to eat! And there goes the flat stomach…

So what is my message behind this post? Well I guess a follow up to make sure you guys are still working on your inner health/happiness and trying to learn to love your body and yourself as a whole, imperfections and all! As I said it’s still a work in progress for me and hey maybe it always will be but I do know that it’s a hell of a lot better than where I was a year ago and 50x better than where I was before I started my health and fitness journey many years ago. I used to place so much emphasis on how I looked being the key factor to being happy and I can tell you right now it’s not. While yes it plays a role in my life it cannot be all I rely on to be happy. Being healthy makes me happy, training makes me happy, being strong makes me happy, eating good foods and still being able to enjoy treats here and there makes me happy. Spending time with friends and family, working in a job I love and let’s face it just being alive makes me happy. Together as a whole these are all things that make me happy and relying solely on how I look or how much I weigh or how much body fat I carry is not EVER going to be the defining factor. And it shouldn’t be for you either.

Remember everyone has their imperfections and flaws but these do NOT define you. Work on them, sure but do not allow them to dictate your happiness within yourself.

Keep practising that self love guys its one of the most important things you can do for yourself yet something people always put aside. Have a great weekend J

 

 

 

Reflections: Look in the mirror, do you like what you see?

This is a topic I have contemplated blogging for some time now. Why haven’t I? I guess because it’s one of those blogs where I have to get a bit raw and personal and that can be a bit scary! Lol. But a few of my clients are facing struggles of finding contentment/acceptance in themselves when they look in the mirror and in order to try help them I figure personal experience is always the best way.

Do I like what I see when I look in the mirror? Mm yes some days. But other days I look in and all I can see is flaws and things I want to change and I get caught up in that. Yes- for those of you who haven’t caught on yet I am human too! In saying this I would have to say my good days- the days where I look in the mirror and accept myself and feel content have grown over the years and in this blog I want to share with you the steps I have taken in getting to this place of semi/majority contentment.

Let’s just say I have been everything when I look at myself in the mirror. By this I mean I have been “fat” “skinny” “muscly” “lean” “very lean” just to name a few lol. I put these descriptive terms in inverted commas because these are a product of what I see  and not necessarily what someone else sees.

I believe we are all guilty of being our own harshest critic. When we look in the mirror we focus mainly on the things we don’t like or the things we need to work on and completely ignore the things that are great about ourselves. Ever had someone give you a compliment and brush it off because you don’t see it yourself so it just CAN’T possibly be true? Yep me too.

We also focus a lot of the time on how our body LOOKS not what it can DO. We live in such an “image based” society where the focus is on aesthetics and unfortunately this is made no easier through social media.

One of the big things I have gained through strength training is an appreciation of my bodies’ strength. I have clients ask me how much I can squat or bench and without thinking it’s a big deal I rattle off the numbers. It’s not until somebody goes “wow” that I think “hey yeah I guess I have come a long way in a few years of training.” Does that strength show in the mirror? Yes I have muscle definition but can you see how strong I am? No. It’s a quality. It’s something I have worked on and worked at, it is a part of me that is not always visible to the eye yet something I should be happy and proud of. And I am.

The other week my brother made a joke about my “thunder thighs” to which a few years ago would have highly offended and upset me even being just a joke. This time I laughed and told him he was just jealous that I could squat heavier than him ;)

To be honest I believe perception is the key. Like I said earlier, how we perceive our own selves is different to how we perceive someone else. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses and everyone has beauty and flaws. It’s about finding those strengths and that beauty and letting them overrule the weaknesses and flaws instead of the other way round. Looking in the mirror post comp and realising I wasn’t that lean anymore (in my eyes remember) was a challenge but remembering that my lifts had all peaked that week was a reminder that how I look in physical appearance is not solely what defines me as a person and we ALL need to remember that more.

 

Learning to be happy in yourself and comfortable with how you look (provided you are making good health choices and exercising) is a constant challenge for most of us and something we have to work on. But it all falls back to what I always say… CONSISTENCY.

You want to be good at anything? Practice it. Consistently. Don’t look in the mirror and go “Oh I hate my thighs they are massive and fat” instead practice finding something good about them like the fact that they ran up and down the stairs 50x or leg pressed 100kg or how about you find another part of your body that you ARE happy with. It could be as simple as looking in the mirror after doing your hair and makeup and putting on a nice outfit and being able to smile and say “hey I look nice today” J

Another tip I would give is to pay more attention to HOW YOU FEEL instead of just focusing on how you look. Do you feel stronger? Fitter? Healthier? How does eating a good nutritious meal feel? This comes back to also being willing to take responsibility for your choices in this aspect. Do you feel like a piece of chocolate cake? Ok, have some. But if you feel guilty after then there is a problem. Listen closely to your body and try make decisions based on how you feel before during and after the fact. Once you can get in tune with how different foods and things make you feel you will be able to make sound decisions and feel good for them not guilt.

One of the main things I get with girls is the desire to be lean and have a 6 pack. Let me tell you that  6 pack abdominals do not come without a price and I do not know many people who walk around with them every day. I trained 6 days a week and dieted for 14 weeks and I still didn’t have ripped abs lol.

So in saying that my next tip is RE-ASSESS YOUR GOALS. Ask yourself why you are doing something and if it's what you really want.
You want to be lean and have abs? Ok tell me why? Do you think looking in the mirror and seeing abs is going to make you happy? Yes. Ok then be prepared to diet hard (unless you have incredible genetics) and train hard and make sacrifices for this. No?  Ok then why not just eat healthy, train hard, enjoy a few treats here and there and ACCEPT that it is NORMAL for you to have body fat and that we women will either carry that fat in our lower abdomen, hips or thighs (I know I know it sucks) but hey it might be time for you to learn to deal with the fact that unless you are going to do the above (which is going to have effect on your health in the long term anyway) that having that small amount of fat on your stomach hips and thighs is OK J

If you want to be stronger or “toned” aka build muscle then accept that yes you are going to have to lift weights and EAT and if you do these things then yes your body is going to change shape in the process. Jeans no longer fit because your quads are too big? That dress you used to wear sits funny because you have hips or a bum now? Then yes ladies I see no other option than to use this as the perfect excuse to go shopping ;) find some clothes that flatter your new shape and highlight the things you have been working so hard on. If this is your goal then instead of feeling discouraged by your new found appearance EMBRACE it and the fact that you kicked ASS in every session this week.

The topic of this blog actually came at the perfect time for me. This week I started prepping again for my next comp. A world that is pretty much based around aesthetics and a persons’ physical appearance. I loved doing my last two comps, seeing my hard work in the gym and dieting “pay off” however in the weeks following I have become more aware of certain things that come from competing that has had me questioning whether this is something I will continue and forced me to re-assess my own goals. These things are all mostly based around today’s topic which of reflections in the mirror. I think that since competing if anything it has made me an even harsher critic of what I see in the mirror and I have become aware of this more so in the last couple of weeks. Everyone knows it’s not realistic to be “comp lean” all year round but it doesn’t stop people from craving it and putting unrealistic pressure on themselves to maintain something very close to it. Ask any fitness competitor and (if they are being honest) they will tell you that once you have had that “lean” feeling it becomes something you want, almost like an addiction I guess you could say.

Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in the idea of eating and training for aesthetic purposes rather than training for health, strength, physical fitness, overall vitality and the thing about competing is that you can lose sight of the other side.

I’ve heard about people rebounding pretty hard from comps in terms of binge eating etc. and while I am not one of these people I can now really see how the mental struggles can get the better of some people post comp. The question I have been asking myself of late though is whether I am competing now simply to get back to that “lean” feeling or am I doing it because it’s something I really want for myself like when I initially began. I am willing to work hard at anything but I know that mentally it needs to be for the right reasons or there will be more severe rebounding for me next time. When I set out to compete it was for myself and if I decide not to compete then that will be for myself too J

Whatever I decide re: competing I have come to a few conclusions and that is where I will leave this post today.

1.       Physical appearance is NOT everything and we all need to put time and effort into FEELING healthy fit and strong not simply focusing on whether we can see it in the mirror.

2.       EVERYONE has their beauty and their flaws. Stop comparing yourself to others and embrace your own beauty and strengths and qualities. You may look at someone else and go “oh I would kill for her legs” yet at the same time she’s eyeing you off thinking “damn that girl has amazing skin”.

3.       Consistently we ALL need to practice embracing ourselves for all that we are and stop looking in the mirror seeing only bad things. This is not to say don’t continue to work on things that are flawed in yourself but don’t let these thing DEFINE or DOMINATE  your life. Be happy. Be comfortable. BE YOU!!

  Hopefully this all makes some kind of sense lol I tend to ramble when I get passionate about a post and as I said this topic has been on my own mind of late. Hope everyone has a great weekend and I encourage you all to practice today finding something to love about yourself in that mirror  xxx

How much water is too much?

Can I drown by drinking too much water? Yes. Am I in danger of this? Highly unlikely.

Am I drinking too much water? Chances are in fact the complete opposite. You are most likely drinking NOT ENOUGH water and this is something I deal with on a regular basis with my clients.

When looking at recommended water intake it is actually recommended that one drinks 1L per 25kg of bodyweight alone. So a 70kg female should be consuming up to 3L per day. We then have to factor in exercise as a component to add to the mix. The recommendation for exercise is 1L per hour of exercise so therefore if the 70kg female is at the gym an hour per day she should be drinking close to 4L as a minimum for her to maintain hydration levels and combat the water lost from her body throughout the day.

It amazes me at how often people will try deter other people from drinking an adequate (yes adequate as in more than 2L) amount of water saying they are drinking too much and that they “may drown”. Let’s be realistic people, yes water intoxication is a real thing and yes it has happened to people but in very EXTREME situations.  The sodium levels in your blood have to be extremely low for this to occur for example excessive exercise without replacement of sodium levels (why endurance athletes drink sports drinks with electrolytes to replace water and sodium at the same time), very low sodium or no sodium diet teemed with excessive water intake or on the more extreme scale a kidney malfunction (where water isn't being secreted from the body properly) or even more extreme a heart malfunction.

In other situations where water intoxication has occurred it has been due to consuming alarming amounts of water in a short amount of time, and when I say alarming we are talking about 3L in an hour. The kidneys of a healthy adult can actually process fifteen liters of water a day! So you are highly unlikely to suffer from water intoxication, even if you drink a lot of water, as long as you drink over time as opposed to taking in an enormous volume at one time.

Water is essential not only for maintenance in the body’s hydration levels but also for kidney function, bowel function, keeping your skin healthy and looking good, flushing out toxins not needed or wanted in your system, aiding digestion and is also a great natural headache remedy!

So don’t be scared to drink more water guys. Unless you are skulling 3L in an hour or some other ridiculous amount you are not likely to be “drowning” on your water intake any time soon. If anything I'm guessing most of you would need to increase your water intake by at least a litre or more .

 

Most of us are up at least 12+ hours a day which is more than enough time to consume the individual recommended amount of water. So instead of reaching for that 3^rd cappuccino or your bottle of coke zero (“but it’s got no sugar”.. yes yes, I know), grab a bottle of water instead and start drinking!